R-E-S-P-E-C-T

In our time of transience, I've been doing what I can to stay productive, helpful and sane. That roughly translates to a partial stay-at-home mom existence of daytime bible studies, laundry, workouts and getting kids off the bus partnered with the working girl dream of doing freelance writing and marketing/PR consulting work on a very flexible schedule (I'm available! Call me!).

Of course, that flexible schedule sometimes means meetings at odd hours, like this morning, when I'll be doing some client work. And I'll be doing it from the couch - in my bathrobe (have I mentioned that I love this flex schedule thing?). It's a good thing that I have some meetings that get me out of the house, though. I dig the bathrobe thing, but I think I respect myself more when I'm wearing a pair of heels...

This works for the time being.

Trying on a Life

Nearly three months ago, we made our big return - to our friends, family, lives - in a way. But, however you feel about the statement "you can't go home," (is it metaphorical or literal?) when you try, it's always different. 

So, I find myself tonight trying on a life (and blogging about it - because even though I don't think my day to day is that interesting, the last couple of weeks have brought requests for revival) even though I'm home.

There are some things to which return and they are blissfully the same - my iTunes library (recently re-discovered), The Bachelor wine nights with my best girlfriends in Lex (and, puzzlingly, the bachelorettes - same drama), the fact that I love driving around with the windows down, and working.

There are lots of things, however, that are incredibly, disturbingly, wonderfully different. My best friend has a baby! Not just any baby - a miracle baby who I adore. Lots of buds have babies, actually. I could have a baby (no, we aren't even trying, but it's that whole marriage thing - I could! Whoa...) I don't have a steady job, so I'm doing marketing and pr consulting work as well as freelancing (too bad for Obama my entrepreneurial efforts don't count for the jobs numbers) - which I have discovered I love (lots of freedom, but also allows me to be self-motivated). My fab husband and I are homeless homeowners (the house is rented, remember), so we live in my in-laws basement (remember?), which brings me to trying on a life today...

My sweet mother in law (yep, actually really love her) is on a vacation with a friend - for 10 days! There is no one in the world who deserves this more, and I'm so happy she could take this break and we can be here to help support the family in the mean time, but that leaves me the sole female in a house with my father- and brothers-in-law as well as my husband. So I've just sent the hubbie to BSF, the in-laws to boyscouts and I'm left with the dishes.

Don't cry for me, though, I only cooked a frozen casserole pre-prepared by said genius MIL and I'm also left with a miraculously quiet house (except the blaring iTunes!) and a glass of wine as I tidy up and wonder about the future...

Just a little fun sample from a new discovery (the hipstamatic app for iPhone - LOVE IT! Must for medium format photography lovers/owners/wishers):

Ashland, The Henry Clay Estate

FAQ - Again

thehardyheyday.blogspot.com

Most of you all know that we've made the move back to the states, but there are still questions that pop up everywhere, so here are the answers and updates.

First of all, let's clarify this question, "What does a move mean to you?"
For us right now, a move constitutes a timeframe longer than a month that includes the transportation of necessary posessions, which include for us - clothes, books and toiletries sufficient for a long trip. It may or may not include permanent housing, jobs or private toilets.

Where are you?
We are basing our little operation in Lexington, Ky., since that's been the most recent professional home for both of us and also includes a lot of contacts and enough family to help us out with things in the near-term. We are making frequent trips to Indianapolis, of course, especially until February when football season lamentably ends.

So...where do you live?
Why? You know a place? Just kidding (sort of).

We bumped around from family spot to family spot during the holidays, then a quick stint as house- and dog-sitters for our buds, the Browns. This week we officially make home in the basement of Jacob's parents.

Every time I tell people this, they give me a look that is dubious and questioning and sympathetic, then say something along the lines of, "Oh. And how is that?" The answer is, there are two younger brothers and a mother and father living full time in the house, plus two other sisters who come and go a bunch, plus us - the newest addition to this boiling stew of madness. It's nearly always buzzing in that place and there are enough people milling through to take up every room in the house if they so chose to divide in such a manner. But that comes with a lot of really fun stuff like impromptu movie afternoons with roaring fires and lots of people stuffed onto couches together, family dinners, and lots of opportunity to catch a member of my new family for a little chat. Plus, need I say it? Toilets that flush. Toilets. That. FLUSH. Like, without a bucket. Woohoo!

Where are you going next?
Ha. If I knew, I'd let you know (as soon as I packed...again). Places on the dockett include returning to the middle east as well as European locales, but the closer we inch to the summer, the longer of a shot those spots are. More likely destinations include Lexington, South Carolina, Florida, California, Nebraska, Arizona, Washington and, basically, anywhere in the United States.

We move to South Carolina in August for Jacob's final two semesters of graduate school and will stay there through graduation in May of 2011.

What are you doing right now?
Why? You want to hang out? Just kidding (sort of).

Jacob continues in the internship search, so he is following up on a lot of applications and resume submissions and is interviewing for positions. He is searching for work in operations and/or product management. He needs three months of experience before we start school again in August.

I am working on self-busyness and improvement by enrolling in Bible Study Fellowship and begining freelance work, the first article coming in Business Lexington last week (yay!) See it here. I'm also doing all the things I always thought about doing when I was working full time and thinking about all the people parading by my window. Those things include cooking, organizing (whatever I have unpacked, that is), socializing and volunteering.

How long have you been married?
Yay! Fun question. Just over a year!

Are you crazy?
Still yes. :)

How's married life?
Still good, humdul'allah! We have a whole new set of things to adjust to right now like both of us being between work, having lots of available friends and things to do, living with family and, hello, being in the United States of America, but everything is good. In the words of my mom, "I'm so glad you still like each other even after the last year." Then Jacob, "We even still LOVE each other." Ahhh...and I do. Love that guy.

Are you abroad-sick? Do you miss things from back there?
Of course! We miss lots of things from overseas, like our friends (both expat and local), being in the midst of a culture that requires constant learning and flexibility and the 70-degree weather we just left (though I'm LOVING the snow!). Not to mention all the Indian food we are used to eating!

What are some of the best things about being home?
Of course family and friends, my dog; plus driving on my own and SNOW (did I mention it's been snowing here?), seeing Mia (check her progress here) and Britt, my hair guru (check her out, too - and if you're in Lex, you should just go).

Where did you go, again?
Morocco for two months, including stops in Fez, Meknes, Volubulis and Marrakech. We also hit up Italy (Rome and Florence) and then made the move to Oman, during which time we traveled to Sohar and Muscat and also Dubai and Abu Dhabi in the Emirates. We went to Jordan in the spring and then the US and on our way back we spent a week in France, with our final stop before home in Egypt. Most of the photos have made it to facebook via the blog or albums. Check them out!

Any other questions? Just let me know.

By(line) the way...

thehardyheyday.blogspot.com

Former colleagues (though thankfully not former friends) at Smiley Pete Publishing are the first to give me (and my new byline) the opportunity to re-start writing - at least in a freelance capacity.

One small step for Anne...one giant leap for Anne Sabatino Hardy.

Business Lexington-Breaking News
January 08, 2010
Mayor avoids layoffs in budget cuts
$12.5 million slashed from budget includes employee furloughs
by Anne Sabatino Hardy

Check it out!

The...grind?

We have officially passed the frenzied holiday season and so this first full working week of the New Year - and new decade - finds me...sitting on the couch? Yes, culture shock is upon me.

For the first time in my adult life I am unscheduled and unbusy and unsure of what to do with myself. I wasn't the type who took off summers to traverse Europe or do study abroad or schlep around to music festivals - tempting as all those things were and still are - I just felt like I needed to work. I wanted to work. So I worked. And when I got a break (or got married!) I filled in the holes of those wished-for experiences the best I could with vacations allowed from the grown-up grind.

Now we are back in the states and Jacob is spending days looking for internships while I dream about how to fill this free time without wasting it. So far freelancing for a couple of local publications is on the dockett as well as visiting with friends and maybe some volunteer opportunities with church or community organizations. It's a dream come true in a way. I just hope I don't dream it away...

Action!

Off the Grid

After the slightly grueling 16-hour flight from Abu Dhabi to Chicago (enough to make you a child-hating-tetris-addicted-hypochondriac-alcoholic), and a mercifully uneventful pass through customs, we made it home for the holidays.

Not surprisingly, we have spent the better part of our time in the last couple of weeks with family - celebrating Christmas and catching up - and we've even snuck in some time with our besties along the way. Regardless, we've been off the grid since we got back. No blog posts, limited facebook, email and even phone or text time.

The time has been pretty eventful, though, including Christmas with both sides of our families, a new baby for some close friends and celebrations of the New Year.

Christmas Morning with my sweet in-laws

New Year's Eve with old time friends

Hanging with Grant and Kendall (Team O) on New Year's Eve afternoon

And what a difference a day makes! Daddy Grant with baby Calloway (12-31-09, 7lbs-4oz!) and Jacob.

Getting in on the traditional Hardy New Year's Day bowling event.

 

And more of the ladies on bowling day...(back to front, left to right) Momma Hardy, Momma Sab, Aunt Mary, Momma Suff and Aunt Jaqui.

أشوفكم انشالله

I have a little break in the action, so to speak, as I wait for our last load of laundry to dry so I can pack it up. Our wardrobe is empty, as the drawers and the cabinets, stuff is piled everywhere - whatever clothes escaped the cotton-chewing insects which plagued us as well as souveniers and books and little scraps of memories. Perhaps, looking at all the things in the latter categories, it's better some of our clothes won't make the return trip!

The last couple of days have been full of sweet sendoffs from our friends here. Friends from different backgrounds, cultures, beliefs and situations who all gave us something during our time here. Lessons, support, tips, rides, meals, family, faith, perspectives, a seat in their homes, a place in their lives. We have one more full day in Buraimi, Oman and then it's an early day on Saturday when we'll head to Abu Dhabi and wing our way West.

الله يلوم when we'll be back (God knows), or if, but they have a saying here when you leave, even for the day and it's been used more than a few times the last few days: أشوفكم انشالله, which means, "I'll see you, God willing."

FAIL

One of the things I'll certainly bring home is the big, bubble-wrapped-with-a-bow-and-shiny-paper-present of memories of tourist and expat FAILS we've experienced here and during travels. Now, it's one thing to be inappropriately dressed for the weather in Italy or sporting an offbeat or unique ensemble in Paris. It's another thing entirely to be caught wearing a normal everyday summer outfit here in the desert (outside of the sacred walls of the Hilton - aka buraimi expat oasis), where anonymity and modesty rule the runways of mall fashion.

What this often means for those of us not qualified to wear a full-time abayya (Never have to pick out an outfit! Always appropriate!) or sheila (Never have to do your hair! Not fair!), is that often we end up wearing maternity-looking long shirts over loose-fitting jeans or 1st-grade-sunday-school-teacher-inspired long skirts (yes, ugh, denim...sometimes kahki). Always long sleeves, always long pants. Fashion, my friends, is not something I've conquered here.

So, you have the choice of looking a bit frump (some of my friends with longer time spent in the area have mastered it), or being inappropriate to a degree (some have bucked it - with varying results). Every person has to decide their own levels. I, for example, will sometimes wear a knee-length dress with a sweater in Dubai or I may even just opt for short sleeves with my jeans. This aggression will not stand (in Buraimi), man.

Other expats and visitors have shown notably less caution in their decisions. Sometimes they're uncautions in the style choosing things like gold lamee. Sometimes they're uncautions in choosing things that are revealing like tube tops. Sometimes it's both (Gold? Lamee? Tube Top? Whaaa...? Ooohhhh, she's English...). Always it's a FAIL.

I wish that Miriam (a fellow collector) and I had more concrete examples to bring back with us (you can't always be at the ready with a hulking D90 in the mall), but in Egypt I found a couple of stand outs that will have to tide us over and prod our memories when the summer winds warm back home and the inappropriately dressed come out...

This is a rare sighting - the maleFAIL. Yes, they are often dressed in unsightly manners, but it's much harder to achieve levels of appropriateness-FAIL for men. But this guy...Wraps. It. Up.

Skinny white dude

In no sleeves

SHORT SHORTS!

Guthra

Extra bonus neg for amount of white, hairy leg exposed and possible wedge-picking

This is also a special kind of FAIL. It's the tourist FAIL. Look at this photo and you may notice that, yes, she's dressed in a sort-of-modest manner. Look closer and you'll see the FAIL.

WEARING the belly dancing scarf with coins that jingle while you walk (obviously purchased at souk prior to arrival at monument)

WEARING the matching headpiece (the one that is a woven/beaded skullcap of glitter and coins and comes free with the belly-dancing-scarf because you are a good, good friend of the stall owner who sold you this monstrosity and promised you the "local" price. HINT: Locals don't wear this.)

This post is dedicated to Miriam and all the attempting to be appropriate girls out there. It's also dedicated to Paula, Jenny V. and Jessie V, just in case you needed any help on the true meaning of FAIL!

Inventory

thehardyheyday.blogspot.com

Part of our leaving here is the dreaded...packing. This is a special kind of packing, though, one that falls just out of the difficulty of packing everything (we only have four suitcases) and just past the ease of short trip (WE ONLY HAVE FOUR SUITCASES!). This week, while Jacob labors in his last week of lessons, I volunteered to stay home and finish the detail things to get us ready to go so that our evenings can be spent alternately on time with friends or job searching.

So, in a flash I'm taken back to this time last year, when another frantic pack-a-thon was in progress, but one that involved nearly four years of accumulated stuff, from clothes (yes, I have to admit it, my clothes were in my dresser, my closet, the dining room closet and the guest room/office closet) to inherited furniture, the robot vaccum (bought to clean up after the puppy) to the dog himself - all while a For Sale sign hovered over the front yard like my mom all those times I refused to clean my room for weeks on end.

The rest of the story, as you may know, is that the clothes got packed or thrown out (lots of things thrown out, thank goodness, but what to wear when we get home?), furniture placed in foster care or storage, vaccum junked and dog relocated to mom's house. My sister-in-law and her girlfriends now occupy the little house in Chevy Chase and Jacob and I took up residence in one of several abodes, the last of which being this little flat in Buraimi.

And now we leave.

We'll leave the things I put in the sale/giveaway list: things like pots, pans, dishes, basil plant, coffee maker, ginkgo leaves and all the toy prizes from all those Kinder Suprise Eggs. We'll bring home souveniers, gifts and whatever posessions make the cut...but what else?

Lots of memories...of our trips and experiences, but also lots of friends!

Messr Memories

thehardyheyday.blogspot.com

We returned from Egypt just this morning on a redeye flight from Alexandria to Sharjah and, after sleeping off a long day, I'm ready to post a preview of pics from our trip. The day started with visiting the only - of seven original - remaining, in tact wonder of the world: The great pyramid of Khufu and ended with a 2:30 am flight from a podunk Egyptian airport on a budget airline. But, we made it safe and sound and much edified and entertained by the time spent.

Jacob and our "friend" Mahmoud (friendship is cheap at Egyptian landmarks - usually about EL1)

Inspecting ancient hyroglyphics - I always wanted to be an archeologist.

Sunset over the Nile from the roof of our hotel in Luxor.

Felucca on the Nile at sunset.

And, the "money shot" of the trip.