FAQ - Again

thehardyheyday.blogspot.com

Most of you all know that we've made the move back to the states, but there are still questions that pop up everywhere, so here are the answers and updates.

First of all, let's clarify this question, "What does a move mean to you?"
For us right now, a move constitutes a timeframe longer than a month that includes the transportation of necessary posessions, which include for us - clothes, books and toiletries sufficient for a long trip. It may or may not include permanent housing, jobs or private toilets.

Where are you?
We are basing our little operation in Lexington, Ky., since that's been the most recent professional home for both of us and also includes a lot of contacts and enough family to help us out with things in the near-term. We are making frequent trips to Indianapolis, of course, especially until February when football season lamentably ends.

So...where do you live?
Why? You know a place? Just kidding (sort of).

We bumped around from family spot to family spot during the holidays, then a quick stint as house- and dog-sitters for our buds, the Browns. This week we officially make home in the basement of Jacob's parents.

Every time I tell people this, they give me a look that is dubious and questioning and sympathetic, then say something along the lines of, "Oh. And how is that?" The answer is, there are two younger brothers and a mother and father living full time in the house, plus two other sisters who come and go a bunch, plus us - the newest addition to this boiling stew of madness. It's nearly always buzzing in that place and there are enough people milling through to take up every room in the house if they so chose to divide in such a manner. But that comes with a lot of really fun stuff like impromptu movie afternoons with roaring fires and lots of people stuffed onto couches together, family dinners, and lots of opportunity to catch a member of my new family for a little chat. Plus, need I say it? Toilets that flush. Toilets. That. FLUSH. Like, without a bucket. Woohoo!

Where are you going next?
Ha. If I knew, I'd let you know (as soon as I packed...again). Places on the dockett include returning to the middle east as well as European locales, but the closer we inch to the summer, the longer of a shot those spots are. More likely destinations include Lexington, South Carolina, Florida, California, Nebraska, Arizona, Washington and, basically, anywhere in the United States.

We move to South Carolina in August for Jacob's final two semesters of graduate school and will stay there through graduation in May of 2011.

What are you doing right now?
Why? You want to hang out? Just kidding (sort of).

Jacob continues in the internship search, so he is following up on a lot of applications and resume submissions and is interviewing for positions. He is searching for work in operations and/or product management. He needs three months of experience before we start school again in August.

I am working on self-busyness and improvement by enrolling in Bible Study Fellowship and begining freelance work, the first article coming in Business Lexington last week (yay!) See it here. I'm also doing all the things I always thought about doing when I was working full time and thinking about all the people parading by my window. Those things include cooking, organizing (whatever I have unpacked, that is), socializing and volunteering.

How long have you been married?
Yay! Fun question. Just over a year!

Are you crazy?
Still yes. :)

How's married life?
Still good, humdul'allah! We have a whole new set of things to adjust to right now like both of us being between work, having lots of available friends and things to do, living with family and, hello, being in the United States of America, but everything is good. In the words of my mom, "I'm so glad you still like each other even after the last year." Then Jacob, "We even still LOVE each other." Ahhh...and I do. Love that guy.

Are you abroad-sick? Do you miss things from back there?
Of course! We miss lots of things from overseas, like our friends (both expat and local), being in the midst of a culture that requires constant learning and flexibility and the 70-degree weather we just left (though I'm LOVING the snow!). Not to mention all the Indian food we are used to eating!

What are some of the best things about being home?
Of course family and friends, my dog; plus driving on my own and SNOW (did I mention it's been snowing here?), seeing Mia (check her progress here) and Britt, my hair guru (check her out, too - and if you're in Lex, you should just go).

Where did you go, again?
Morocco for two months, including stops in Fez, Meknes, Volubulis and Marrakech. We also hit up Italy (Rome and Florence) and then made the move to Oman, during which time we traveled to Sohar and Muscat and also Dubai and Abu Dhabi in the Emirates. We went to Jordan in the spring and then the US and on our way back we spent a week in France, with our final stop before home in Egypt. Most of the photos have made it to facebook via the blog or albums. Check them out!

Any other questions? Just let me know.

You might notice some odd posts if you subscribe to thehardyheyday.blogspot.com, or follow us on Facebook.

No worries, these are just the posts of our other blog, Moroccomyworld. Despite it's really awesome name (thanks, Jess!), it's become a bit inactive, so I migrated it to The Hardy Heyday so that all the photos and recipes are still available.

We'll keep posting the adventures here. Stay tuned!

Tour of Flats 2009

In Morocco, we detailed our living situation and, by popular demand, I've finally captured a few shots of the showpiece that is our flat in Buraimi. So, here goes:

Living Room (complete with husband and, yea-elliptical machine!)

"Entertainment Center" (We read a lot these days)

Bedroom Vanity

Check out more killer Middle-Eastern bedding. Upgrade or downgrade from red zebra?

I excluded the "squat pot" (Eastern-style floor toilet) and the washing machine (bonus!)

Dining Room

This is the kind of kitchen they advertise as "charming" in a decrepit NYC building

But at least we're sans cockroaches lately! Plus, Jacob says, no matter what you say about this apartment, I got you marble countertops. Indeed!

It's not exactly my little place in Chevy Chase (which will be inhabited soon by my new sister-in-law), but it's home for now. And it has the most important thing in it: Air Conditioning. Just kidding. The husband, obviously!

All New FAQ

A lot has changed since arriving in Oman/UAE. One of those is that I'm settling into what is, well, actual life somewhere. It's not quite like the three months of our engagement when there was so much to do to get ready for the transition, nor like the six weeks of Morocco where we were trying to experience things and figure out how to live with an eye on the next move...this is actually my life. It's hard to believe and, at times it's been hard to get adjusted. I currently have at two blog entries in the queue and more than that in my mind and I just haven't been able to get my mind around a feeling that I can share. It's a whole different experience here and so I figured the best way to really commence blogging here is to update the FAQs....

So, what the heck are you doing there?
Still school, same as last time in a way, but this round I'm a student, too. Not quite the same time commitment as Jacob, but I'm in some private tutoring and have learned the alphabet (Yea! I'm officially as educated as a toddler).

Are you coming back to the states?
We're still planning on being home for Christmas until internship time and the last two semesters in Columbia, but we're also planning a trip home for the August recess as well! Yea!

How long have you been married?
This is totally unnecessary but fun to say. Nearly four months!

Are you crazy?
THAT answer certainly hasn't changed. Still a big yes.

How's married life?
Still fabulous and fun. I remember his mom telling me once that being married was like a slice of heaven and, as much as I loved Jacob before we were married (and even with the great marriages I've seen in my life!) it seemed like a lot to live up to, but she's absolutely right. It's also a lot of fun to have our first "real" place. An actual apartment with more than two rooms and a kitchen and living room all to ourselves!

What's it like there?
Holy cow. This is the biggest change in an FAQ. Reading the Morocco responses, it's so funny how different it is here and how quickly I forgot what "cold" is! First off, all my girlfriends were really fond of saying I was moving to the deserts of Africa. Morocco was not the desert. Oman most certainly is! We are surrounded by sand and dust that occassionally kicks up in furious winds that drive it right through the window cracks and under doors so that we and all our posessions are constantly powdered with desert earth. Unless, that is, it's storming furiously. We discovered that the spring storms here rival the nastiest and most surprising midwest/midsouth disturbances. Complete with flooding, hail and power outages (and that was just our apartment).

The GAP (Gulf Arabic Program) school is a lot different from ALIF (American Language Center in Fez), too. It's full of a much more diverse crowd (People from the states and Americans who grew up and were living in other places like Saudi and the Sudan, Koreans and Swedes) and most of them are either grad-level students or adults pursuing professional education or those who are simply pursuing a self improvement. The classes are taught by Omani professors, both men and women, a few of them show up in photos you'll see from us. They are very social (two, Muhammed and Hussein are both in shots from The Sacrifice).

Oman and UAE, despite what many people hear about Dubai, are both much much more conservative than Morocco was. Though there is a large expat population in the city of Dubai, the Abu Dhabi province and even the Dubai province outside the city, are less diverse. The Muslim religion is also much more common and is observed in the great majority and with dedication. The calls to prayer are about the same as Morocco, but you see a lot more people responding to them. We've even encountered taxi drivers stopped on the side of the road arranging a prayer mat to face toward Mecca. Nearly all women in Oman are covered, wearing a Burka or an Abbaya. In UAE it's a little less conservative; some 80s-inspired (very styled) bangs peep out of the headscarves and fewer faces are covered. Sometimes they switch things up a bit with colors of scarves. The men typically wear a Kandura and headscarf. Most people in UAE speak English as well as Arabic, it is very common to hear and there is a rare sign not written in English, too. It's more Arabic in Oman, but not out of the ordinary to be able to speak about as much English with someone from here as they could speak Arabic to us!

We are attending a church in Al Ain, one of several on a private hospital's compound. They are all evangelical christian churches, but each one caters to a different cultural preference. Our "western-style" service rotates contemporary with traditional worship and teaching is in English. I'm not sure of all the other services, but I know there are a couple of African services and I think Chinese. Though, as in Morocco, Islam and Mosques dominate, there is also a prominent Catholic Church in Al Ain, near our church.

Buraimi, where we live and study, is an odd place, a border town that has a burgeoning population because of the proximity to the UAE. It's well developed in that utilities function fairly well, there are many businesses and restaurants (although most are annoyingly similar to the seven just down the way that do the same thing) and a couple of institutes of higher education. The roads are paved and well-maintained, but none have names (...). The roundabouts, however, are named for their decoration or proximity (the mosque roundabout, the coffee roundabout) and are so common there is literally hardly a single left turn in the entire city! Despite it's proximity to the UAE, Oman is less westernized in its offerings as far as commerce. The entire country of Oman, in fact, has been very dedicated to preserving it's traditional roots. It's an older, more established country than the UAE and is a Sultanate, ruled by Sultan Qaboos, who is much beloved in the country and credited for the country's progress in recent years.

Al Ain, in the UAE, just about 10 minutes by car (depending on the border crossing, which is intermittantly inflamed and swollen, depending on the tempraments of the guards and the relations between local politicians), is where we go to church and have experienced a couple of cultural events, has good restaurants, hotels that are expat havens and more expanded grocery shopping. There is one great word to give you a picture of Al Ain (and if you know me, you'll know how I feel about it as anything other than an escape): Malls. They love their freaking malls! Malls and foodcourts, foodcourts and malls. Malls and foodcourts and souks. I guess when it's 120 degrees in the summer, it's good to have a place to go away from home with A/C. I grudgingly admit that the malls do provide a place to purchase nearly every critical thing (except pork, alcohol and the New Yorker magazine) familiar to home stores. UAE is a recently developed country that formed when several smaller Arab states (emirates) joined together. They are ruled by a central government comprised of regional leaders. Abu Dhabi is ruled by on Sheikh who is also the President and Dubai is ruled by another Sheikh who is also the vice president, and so on.

PS-In the UAE, they love their cars. Love them. Mostly fancy schmancy cars or trucks, which they plaster with hearts and faces of the Sheiks and drive in such a haphazard manner (Islam is very fatalistic, so hey, why not? Insh'allah-if Allah wills it-after all) that it's hardly advisable to drive anywhere near them. Especially since, even if an Emerati (or Omani) person smashed their Benz/Range Rover/Beamer into you head-on at 60 km/h while you were sitting still in the back seat of a parked Hyundai, it would be your fault (If you weren't in the country, it wouldn't have happened. Duh.).

We've had the opportunity to meet lots of new people, but we spend the most time with Omanis. The men and women are frequently separated here, and that goes for social and meal times, too, so when we hang with our new friends (like Abdullah and Amal, pictured right) it's usually with Jacob in one room with the boys and me and the girls in another room, the two are usually separated by a curtain. At first, as with the attire, I was a little dubious, but turns out...not such a bad thing. It's easier to relax and having some private time to eat, chat, giggle and, especially for the Omanis, they can (literally) let their hair down when it's just the girls. And, don't get me wrong, I love being married, but it's always good to have girl time, right! It's not a hard and fast rule, especially in public, but it's common in homes.

One thing that is kind of funny, though, is that the hosts will frequently prepare food that is amazing and then not eat it...or at least until they're sure that you've been sufficiently stuffed and "strengthened." They think that being thin makes you weak, and they are ultrahospitable, so they're constantly picking the best parts of the fish or chicken off the bones and mixing it with the spicy rice, then pinching great portions into the fresh bread before shoving it at you insisting, "Cooli, cooli!" (Eat! Eat!).

Do you like living there?
Most of the time. It's not home, so there are times it's easier and times it's not (we both miss our family and friends and I miss my dog!). The times it isn't fun are eased by the other good times we have, a package arriving from a friend (thanks Elisabeth!) or a pending visit (can't wait Warren and Michelle!)

Are you homesick? Do you miss things from home?
Yep. Not in a debilitating way, but the things I had pangs for in Morocco are missed a bit more acutely now. Mostly the family and friends (and schedule!).

What are you doing there?
Taking some private tutoring and then an intensive summer session in colloquial Arabic. I'm still looking at some opportunities for freelancing and have also opened myself up to do some English teaching or tutoring. We're also having a lot of fun with our freedom of schedule!

Are you going to travel while you're living abroad?
Still "Duh." During our time in Morocco we saw Meknes, Volubulis and Marrakech in addition to Fez. After Morocco we took a quick trip to Rome and we've spent time in Dubai and Abu Dhabi in the Emirates as well as Sohar and Muscat (new photos!) in Oman. There's a lot more to see of Oman and other spots that are close, affordable and desirable like Bahrain, Egypt, India, Qatar and locales in Africa. We hope to take one more quick trip (location TBD) before our August visit home and we'll see where life takes us after that!

The Hardy Heyday FAQs

Don't worry, photos and tales of Marrakech are on the way, but I've decided to take a break to answer, on the blog, some of the most common questions about me, Jacob, the trip, what the heck we're doing here, married life and plans for the future.

So, what the heck are you doing there?
Jacob is in the midst of an International Master of Business Administration degree with the University of South Carolina's Moore School. The program is 33 months long and includes a requirement for language as well as an international internship. Jacob decided to pursue Arabic, so we are in Fez, Morocco until mid-February and, following that, in Al-Buraimi, Oman. We'll be in language studies until the end of 2009. Afterwards, we're unsure exactly but Jacob will most likely have a work experience for an additional 2-6 months. I'm along for the ride and the experience.

Are you coming back to the states?
Probably following the language and internship time we'll head back to the US for a couple of final semesters in Columbia, SC. Following that, we're unsure.

How long have you been married?
Since December, 27, 2008. Just three days before we moved to Fez.

Are you crazy?
Yes!

Why did you get married so quickly? Did you consider waiting a little while?
We got married so quickly because we were excited to be married to each other! Yes, the school schedule (classes started on January 5) prompted us a bit (we didn't want to be apart for up to 18 months), but I wouldn't change a thing about our relationship or our three-month engagement. At first I thought perhaps 6 or 8 months would have been better, but as we thought through things, this was the best option. I'd recommend a short engagement to anyone getting married.

How's married life?
It's great. Everyone should be as blessed as we are to get to be together, to find another person without whom he or she can't imagine life. It's a crash course, I'll tell you, especially this way, but it's great! I loved life before Jacob but I wouldn't take it back if you paid me.

What's it like there?
It's colder than we expected, and it rains a lot, but it's been (according to the locals), the coldest, rainiest winter in 30 years and "all Moroccans (all 29 million or so of them) are sick." It's sort of tropical, though, in that there are citrus and palm trees everywhere. It's interesting, too, in its mix of cultures.

There are a lot of different kinds of people here, both ethnically and religiously. Calls to prayer ring out from the minerettes of mosques five times a day and it's not uncommon to see people headed to mosque or spreading a rug to pray in the direction of Mecca after these calls, although it's not as prolific as one might think. Some women, probably more than not although, again, it's not as common as I thought, wear the hijab (a veil) Many speak at least a couple of languages, often French, Arabic and some English or Spanish. In addition to the many mosques, there are also at least one Catholic church and one "International Protestant" church, but we've not attended either, so far. Morocco is a constitutional monarchy that legislates a freedom of religion for its people, even though proselytizing outside of Islam is technically illegal.

The city of Fez reminds me of Mexico, it's charming in parts and incomplete in others. One of the Imperial cities of Morocco, it's a tourist destination to be sure, especially the cramped and twisted corners of the old city (medina) which, along with the historical significance of its elements, can distinguish it from the more open squares and souqs of locations like Meknes or Marrakech. Hassan II, a main road that leads to the palace in Fez, is one of my favorite places to walk. It's a divided road with a large, grassy median that is lined in palm trees and a canopy of twinkle lights that make for a dream-like-starry-night-stroll, even under frequent clouds. Hassan II also boasts several delightful French-inspired patisseries serving honey-soaked pastries and creamy cafe au lait inexpensively.

Oh, and there are lots of shops in Ville Nouvelle (new city) and the medina (original or "old town") selling traditional dress (Djellaba, which are made for both men and women) as well as more westernized clothing and sunglasses, rich and beautiful upholstery fabrics, scarves (both locally woven and, just like New York, some from China and Pakistan), rugs, lamps, spices, dried fruits and figs, nuts, nougat candies, fresh-pressed olive oil (much different than oil at home it seems much greener and fruitier, but delicious nonetheless), teapots and trays, traditional Moroccan pottery (tagines and intricate blue-patterned dishes of all sorts), tiled-mosaic pieces from tables to tiny replica fountains and much more!

What kind of people are you meeting?
Oh, all kinds! Most frequently, of course, we meet people associated with the school: instructors (more Jacob than me), employees of the school like Yusef, who arranges trips and housing for ALIF students, other students and residents of the Villa (expats from the states, New Zealand, England, Austrailia and other places) and, one of my personal favorites and my instructor in matters of the Moroccan home and kitchen, Layla.

There are also a few individuals who stand out and shape our interactions and views of the people here. Cheese guy, for example, who keeps a stall in the central market and imports cheese from all over, offering an assortment of gorgeous French bries and camemberts, Moroccan selections, goudas and swiss, although harder cheeses like cheddar (much to Jacob's chagrin) and parmesan are notably absent. He stands behind his glass case, usually with one or two men blocking the tiny entrance and talks to you for a moment before inviting you into his store to try or purchase cheese, a fresh sardine (his own recipe) or perhaps (gasp!) a prohibited beverage.

The sandwich guys are also a common interaction for us. They occupy a small storefront just outside the central market and lure us with hot, spiced ground meat cooked on a large griddle and stuffed inside a crusty loaf along with spicy olives or potatoes, mashed and spiced, fried and combined with an egg cooked over-medium in another crusty loaf along with olives (of course!)

Bread guy is another favorite because, while you can get khobz nearly everywhere, he also offers a delicious oily flatbread (perfect for eating with cous cous or Nutella), doughnuts (in the original sense of a ring of fried dough dusted with sugar) and gigantic harcha, which is sliced and served with laughing cow, butter and/or honey.

Juliette was the first person I spoke with, in whole sentences, after we arrived here (other than Jacob, of course!). She's an Austrailian married to a Moroccan and living here in Fez. She owns and runs a little store selling staple items, maps, postcards, sodas and snacks. She also changes money and can be retained to locate hard-to-find things like lactose-free milk for Clinton.

Who are you there with?
Other than those mentioned above, the South Carolina Arabic Track students Jacob and I will be spending our year abroad with include: Miriam and Aaron, Clinton, Dave, Leigh, Matthew.

Do you like living there?
I like a lot about Morocco and Fez. I like the central market, the new foods and cooking, the people around us, the french pastries, the fact that everywhere around me is new and offers a new adventure and memory. I even have begun to like the simplicity of doing things by hand that are so mechanized back home (washing all dishes by hand, line-drying laundry, cooking everything from scratch). I like the freedom of our experience and the stories we've created. I like the way this experience is shaping me-and us.

It will be interesting to see how Al Buraimi suits us once we get there. It's said to be quite different. I'll let you know.

Are you homesick? Do you miss things from home?
Oh, every now and then I do get a pang. I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss things, but I am having a ball out here and can't wait to see upon what else Jacob and I come in our adventures. I do miss my family (and Jacob's) and friends immensely, I miss my dog-my buddy and formerly-constant companion, I miss sitting on my charming little front porch watching the neighbors in my fabulous neighborhood walk by. I miss community involvement, my clothes and shoes (fashion in general, my life is relegated to jeans and tshirts right now!), brown sugar, Chick-fil-A and the springtime promise of girlscout cookies.

I don't miss: driving and traffic (I only have to fight it from the back of a Petit Taxi here and believe me, drivers are fighters on passengers' behalves-driving here is a demonstration of aggression nearly unequaled!), wedding planning, dating, and washing, folding, drycleaning and caring for all the clothes I miss!

What are you doing there?
For the first six weeks, I'm taking a bit of a sabbatical. I am doing something I wasn't sure I'd ever really do-I am a housewife! There are still quite a few things to keep track of back home as far as finances and a few other business dealings, so I stay on those things. I also journal and write quite a bit, I'm constantly trying to shorten the list of people to whom I still owe a thank you note from our wedding. I try to keep the blogs updated and stay in touch with a couple of writing mentors back home to continue opening doors for freelancing opportunities. I'm learning some Arabic phrases and, slowly but surely, the alphabet. I may take classes in Oman, depending on availability of other work or activities. I take cooking classes a couple of times a week and I'm learning more about the sweet camera Jacob's family got us. I make the bed, do the laundry, cook and keep our little apartment tidy-and I like it!

Are you going to travel while you're living abroad?
As my girlfriends would say, "Duh." Of course, all things depend on timing and finances, and school comes first, but we're hoping to do and see as many things as possible. We've so far traveled to Meknes, Volubulis and Marrakech. We'd love to see a couple more places in Morocco before we leave, too.

We'll also be making a stop in Rome for a few days and Dubai before we end up in Oman and after that the dreams include (for me, at least) anywhere in Europe and (for both of us) Egypt, and an African Safari, possibly in Kenya.

Did I miss anything? Let me know....